Phone Side Order

blink. blink. blink. blink.

I’m champing at the bit. My leg is furiously shaking up and down. My eyes are glued to that steady blinking, orange tinted light.Greg is knee deep in conversation with Brittney. It wouldn’t be noticeable if I went to grab my napkin and slyly take my phone with it. Would it?

Greg glances over during his attempt at hitting it off with Brittney, noticing the cogs turning in Maria’s head. “Maria, you’re looking a bit awkward with your poutine barely touched. We’re at Elgin Street Diner! How could your poutine not be finished already? Don’t tell me you’re having phone withdrawals?”

 “What? No! I’m trying not to get sick from overhearing that chick bragging about winning the Pokémon Tournament at the G-Anime Convention last weekend. Really? Who still plays that crap?”


 blink. blink. blink. blink.


 Did he notice me looking at my phone? It’s just a game. I can’t afford to pay everyone’s bill if I decide to pick up my phone. Social media can’t have this much power over me. Right now I should be joining in on the convo with Greg and Brittney, and not worried about who just commented on my fb pic or who texted me. I’m always the one bitching about ppl who can’t look where they walk bc they’re always twiddling their thumbs on their phone. Have some control.

Maria breaks away from her trance like state, catching Brittney’s last few words. “Oh yeah, I so want to go to that Chili Pepper’s show this April! Too bad they don’t do the sock show anymore. Anthony Kiedis…sock show….”


blink. blink. Blink. Blink.


What if some compy from LinkedIn mssged me about a possible job offr?! I need to check my phone!  Wait…what is this song playing right now? Shazam would easily tell me. Ugh, stop it Maria. You’re only at this restrnt for like 2 hours—that’s it, then you can be ‘connected’ to the wrld.

 “Oh my god Maria, remember that last show we went to this past summer and some guy pulled the string on your bikini top while you were crowd surfing?”


Blink. Blink. Blink. Blink.


Oky. Tht comment is way 2 embrrssing for me. I need my phone, my shield. I need it 2 avoid this convo and act like it never hppned. Phones are not always 4 looking at useless things like “Damn You Auto Correct.” At this particular time, I need this device 2 get me out of dis humiliation and in 2 my own little world!!

 “Yeah! That dirty bastard was lucky he didn’t get my fist in his face! See these beauties right here? Probably the only time he had a chance of seeing real ones, besides in movies of course.”


Blink. Blink. BLINK. BLINK.


I’m rdy to cave in. my willpwr is 0 and I must sign on twitr to check my latest mentions. dis tiny insignificant looking device has the powr to ruin my facetoface interactions. i take the friends in front of me 4 grnted while the ‘others’ prbly consider me as just an addtion 2 their massive social mdia lst of ‘friends.’ howevr, i am lost w/o the posiblty to access any bit of info on someons life or anything else.

 Greg leaps out of his seat. “Be right back! I just saw Tony walk by. I’m gonna tell him to join us for a few drinks.”

 Maria and Brittney look at one another, both trying to determine whether the same thoughts are racing in each other’s head. Brittney fiddles in her pocket and pulls out a black slim object.




“I have my work phone in my hand and my phone is still stacked. Winning!”

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One Response to Phone Side Order

  1. lydcard says:

    I claim this! It’s awesome.

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