Entrance to Heaven Application

Entrance to Heaven Application

– Reference form –

Heaven Office Use OnlyApplicant #: 7 006 215

Date of Application Received: March 30, 2012

Application reviewed by: God

Reference’s information:

Name: Saint Edmund                     Last Name: of East Anglia

Information of Applicant you are referencing for:

First Name: Ryan                                      Last Name:   DeLaurentis              Age: 19

Date of Birth (DD/MM/YY): 18/07/93

Address (during time of life): 6578 Willow Park Dr.

City: Fallingbrook                            State: Ontario                                   Zip Code: K1C 2P6

Natal country: Canada                              Continent: North America

Instructions:

Please fill out the field above.

Please answer each question below.

Be as thorough as possible, this is an assessment of the applicant’s life.

Do not disregard any sins the applicant may have committed.

Please note:  Any reference form including false information will not be considered.

Part 1 – Summary of applicant’s life

Please provide an accurate review of the applicant’s life.  Only fill out sections that are relevant to the applicant’s lifetime.  Include all milestones and sins.

Childhood

Ryan DeLaurentis lived a difficult childhood.  Despite his efforts, he could not turn away from Satan’s calling.  Ryan stole.  Ryan lied.  Ryan harmed.  But I could see in his eyes that Ryan meant well.In the fourth grade, Ryan began stealing from his community grocery store.  I often heard the crackling of sesame bar wrappers in his shoes.  I saw him stuff his pockets with Mr. Noodle packets.  And once, I gave him the courage to hide apples in his jacket hood.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

In the sixth grade, Ryan began lying.  He often bore bruises; sometimes on his arms, his ribs and his face.  I would often hear him say he got them from fighting with the kids at school; but that was never true.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

Shortly after, Ryan began to harm.  I could hear him cry at night because of the bruising.  One day, Ryan had enough and harmed in return.  I remember the look on his face; he wanted revenge, and so I gave him strength.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

Adolescence

Ryan DeLaurentis lived a difficult adolescence.  Despite his efforts he could not turn away from Satan’s calling.  Ryan stole.  Ryan lied.  Ryan harmed. But I could see in his eyes that Ryan meant well.In the tenth grade, Ryan was suspended and obliged to change schools.  He made friends with the wrong crowd and began stealing again.  He no longer stole apples and sesame bars.  He stole his school’s media club equipment such as laptops, DVD players, and cameras.  He was swift.  I gave him that skill because I knew he needed it.  Caught for stealing, Ryan was suspended again and all neighbouring schools refused to register him.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

After a few months out of school, Ryan began to lie once more.  He was stuck in a situation he could not get out of; it was a matter of life or death.  Unfortunately, Ryan made friends with the wrong crowd in high school.  Despite is scholarly absence his ‘friends’ had a firm grip on him.  And so Ryan began selling drugs.  This lasted a few years. The money he earned through this job made people talk, but I whispered to him to reply with a lie.  I could sense the city scrutinizing, but I hoped Ryan couldn’t.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

As his frustration built up, Ryan began to do harm.  He did not want to be a thief, nor did he want to be a liar.  But he got caught up in a downward spiral he could not spin out of.  He constantly thought of his responsibilities but did not know how to achieve them.  I tried to show him the way, but his eyes were wide shut.  Ryan kept falling and falling until he fell down the brook of Fallingbrook park.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

Adulthood

Moment of death

Ryan DeLaurentis lived a difficult life.  Despite his efforts he could not turn away from Satan’s calling.  Ryan stole.  Ryan lied.  Ryan harmed.  But I could see in his eyes that Ryan meant well.On the night of March 29, 2012, Ryan DeLaurentis took his life.  At the edge of the brook in Fallingbrook park, is where he last stood.  His last thought was for his sister Hailey to be alright.  His last words were ‘If only things were different’.  His last step was down into the brook. I recall him leaving with a smile, proud of what he had accomplished for his sister.  Despite this, he could not live with the guilt of committing such sins.  He was determined that his was his time.  I saw no other way for him to go, so I showed him the light.  Yes Lord, Ryan has sinned; but I have helped him do so.

Part 2 – Reference’s defence on Applicant’s entrance to Heaven

Please defend your position. Explain why this applicant should be considered.

I, Saint Edmund of East Anglia, have been Ryan DeLaurentis’ Guardian of happiness and protection since his birth.  As previously mentioned, Ryan has sinned in both childhood and adolescence.  He stole, he lied and he harmed.  But his sins were committed with reasoning.Ryan began stealing from his community’s grocery store to provide food for his sister Hailey.  Both Hailey and Ryan’s parents were careless of their children.  Ryan grew up into a man before he could be a boy.  He had no choice but to hold his sister’s life as his responsibility.

When fallout occurred between their parents, both children were left in the custody of their uncle.  Ryan’s uncle was physically abusive with him for quite some time.  But Ryan was sworn to secrecy, for if he told the truth, his sister would suffer.  Ryan lied about his bruises to keep his sister safe.

And when Ryan became harmful, it was towards his uncle.   However, as I saw it happen with my own eyes, I can assure you, Lord, that this was a moment of self defense.  One good thing that came out of this was that Ryan’s uncle never laid a hand on him again.

And so Ryan continued his cycle of sinning: stealing, lying and harming, but still within good reasoning.  He stole school equipment to sell it in return for money he would save for his sister and him to leave the town, and start fresh.  He sold drugs for the same reason.  And Lord, I promise you, that he did not abuse of any illegal substances during this time.

Ryan had a plan as he stepped off the brook.  He had saved enough money for his sister to be well, but no amount of money could get him out of the mess he was in.  Having taken part in too many illegal activities, with too many dangerous and powerful individuals had trapped him in a corner.  But Ryan had a plan as he stepped off the brook.

As Guardian of happiness and protection, I feel as though I have failed.  Ryan’s only moment of happiness and protection was as he stepped off the brook.  So Lord, I ask you to consider this applicant as he currently stands outside the scolding iron gates of Hell because of his sins.  This boy, who became a man too quickly, may have sinned but it was for the benefit of both his sister’s life and his own.

Part 3 – Consent

As an applicant, I agree with the terms and conditions related to applying for an entrance to Heaven.  I trust that the information given by my guardian is accurate and trustworthy.  I understand that my guardian may not neglect the discussion of sins I may have committed, which in return, may negatively influence the status of my application.

Applicant’s Name: ________________________      Date: _______________

Applicant’s Signature: ________________________      Date: _______________

As the official reference and guardian of the applicant, I agree with the terms and conditions related to referencing the application for an entrance to Heaven.  All information disclosed in this form is accurate and trustworthy.  I understand that I must discuss all sins the applicant may have committed, which in return, may negatively influence the status of their application.

Reference’s Name: ________________________      Date: _______________

Reference’s Signature: ________________________      Date: _______________

Heaven Office Use OnlyApplication Status: Approved

Date of Application review: April 11, 2012

Approved by: God

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